To me, life seems to be all about “relationship, relationship, relationship.” How about you?
I think that most of us move from one relationship to the other numerous times every day, and the type and quality of these relationships also changes many times. Whether it is being with my daughter, talking to a client (long-term or brand new), or meeting a friend for dinner, without high-quality varied relationships, life would really be a drag!
For today’s podcast we are going to learn from (a.k.a. “model”) people who do an excellent job of creating and maintaining relationships with others. I am hoping you find this podcast to be of definite interest, and remember if you let us know your opinions, both positive and negative, Tony and I will do our best to create podcasts on topics that interest you the most.
If you go to the podcast on the site, you will see that we have started to include an outline of the key points in each podcast. We started to do this as a result of feedback from some of our listeners. If you are in a hurry or just want to read what the podcast is about, this should help.
Before you listen to the podcast you might want to scroll down to the “Musings” section of this newsletter and read what I have to say about relationships.
So when you are ready, have a listen to today’s podcast and hopefully it will lead you to have better relationships in the future.
When it comes to describing individuals who are excellent at creating relationships with others, I believe Alex Noble does a wonderful job of describing what is important. Here is what he has to say:
“There is a quality in a few unique individuals which I can only best describe as acceptance. In the presence of such persons, I feel safe, at home, and eager to share and learn. Their attitude toward life is gentle and affirming, and this in turn brings out the best and the deepest in me, and makes me feel somehow capable of all the good I have ever hoped to accomplish.”
Alex perfectly encapsulates the type of person I strive to be in my everyday life, even though I often fail miserably at doing so! Indeed I would be very interested in hearing from anyone who does not ascribe to the ideal he sets forth. Parents, coaches, bosses, friends, prison guards… Is there a job or relationship in life where being kind and supportive does not work all that well? To me, I would think not. As long as we don’t equate “being kind” with a person who easily gives in to the dictates of others. Being kind does not at all need to mean “being soft and weak”!
When I first started out as a coach many years go, I thought that my job was mainly to help people get clear and take action. It didn’t take me all that long to realize that in order to help people get clear and take action that I first needed to help them feel safe to share and talk about subjects that were delicate for them.
Next I realized that in order to help them feel capable of change, I needed to be gentle and affirm the good I saw in them. When I was able to do this, my clients wound up feeling much more capable of achieving the goals they had been struggling with.
When working with others, whether in a corporate job, or as a parent, life partner, or friend, there is often a task that either one or both parties want to accomplish. My experience has taught me that the best way to complete the task at hand is to build and maintain a high quality relationship with one’s counterpart. I find that this principle is even more important when the task at hand seems daunting. Two people working together in harmony tend to be much more able than two individuals working separately. Sometimes I like to say that 1 + 1 can equal much more than 2.
If you would like to learn more about what I have to share on this topic, please have a listen to our podcast.