Take a few moments when you are in a quiet space, to note down four times/events/relationships in your life that were seemingly very important at the time of occurrence. Best to choose “two and two” meaning two times that you felt lucky or blessed, and two times when you felt unlucky, or cursed.
Place these four events in the following order:
Lucky-Unlucky-Lucky-Unlucky. Now think of the first event and do whatever works for you to revivify your memory. For most folks I would suggest closing one’s eyes while doing this, but this is not crucial. As you revivify your memory, notice what you feel and don’t feel in your body, and notice your breathing, posture, and tiny rocking movements if any. Carry on until you feel like you have been able to notice your somatic memory of the experience, along with the visual and auditory components of your memory.
Open your eyes and take some terse notes about what you noticed in regard to your breathing, posture, tiny rocking movements, and any other parts of your somatic experience. When you are done with your notetaking, takea deep breath, and move around some until you feel like you have come back to “neutral.”
When ready, do the above again alternately with the three remaining memories (Unlucky, Lucky, Unlucky). Again, in each instance when done, note your somatic experience in detail, and then shake out and come to neutral.
If you are able to follow this kind of process with any success, you should definitely notice that a number of physical/somatic variables are different depending on which type of memory you are revivifying, “lucky or unlucky”. If indeed you can notice the differences, over the course of time you can experiment with changing the physical variables of your memories in order to change the way you feel about your past experiences. The theory being: If you significantly change the way you use your body when thinking about, remembering, or taking part in, specific experiences, you will significantly change the quality of your experience, and how you feel about what transpires. This can turn out to be quite a powerful learning.
And no matter what, if you look back at times that you initially thought were quite horrible or devastating, isn’t it true that most of these events, over the course of time, did not turn out to be nearly as devastating as you initially felt they were? Certainly this has been my experience.