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1. Rhythms of the body, music of
the soul
Sometimes I feel terrible,
And I identify my state as "depression".
Being depressed I feel like doing nothing.
Or perhaps it's more accurate to say,
I feel like I'm incapable of doing anything that will lead
me to feel good.
My depression is a kind of stubbornness.
I stubbornly hold onto my belief that life sucks and I'm incapable
of feeling fulfilled.
There are other times when I feel great,
And it seems like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders,
I'm certain my physical stature increases by a centimeter or
two at such times.
Little by little, I've begun to realize that feeling great
is both similar to and different from feeling depressed.
The similarity is that both states require a large quantity
of ENERGY.
The difference is- When I'm feeling depressed a large quantity
of energy is locked up inside me, and when I'm feeling great
a large quantity of energy flows through me and out into the
world.
Believe it or not, it takes more energy to be depressed then
it does to feel great. Being depressed is hard work!
And then sometimes...
I go from feeling great, to feeling uptight.
When this happens, my "feeling great" energy speeds up,
I get overheated,
And can't manage the flow of energy trying to make its way
through my system.
At such times, I realize my nervousness is similar to my depression,
In that both states involve a large quantity of energy getting
locked up inside me.
At home,
When I fill my washing machine with a large quantity of laundry,
A clump of clothing often gets stuck on one side of the machine
during the spin cycle.
Next thing I know the machine gets unbalanced and starts running
out of control…
It spins wildly, rattles violently and makes ugly noises.
At such times, the automatic cut-off switch kicks in,
The machine stops running,
And waits for me to reposition the load.
Without the cut-off switch the machine would either wind up
breaking apart, or "walking" itself out to the next room,
Damaging everything in its path!
Sometimes, just like my washing machine,
I also get unbalanced, spin wildly, rattle violently, and make
ugly noises.
The problem being,
That unlike my washing machine,
I don't appear to have a cut-off switch,
And I often spin out of control, until I finally exhaust myself.
Here's what I've learned to do along the way. Hopefully my
experience can serve you as well.
1. Don't wait so long to do your laundry!
Tune into how you're feeling on a regular basis, and you'll
have a lot less "dirty laundry" to deal with at any one time.
The smaller the load, the easier it is to control.
2. Train yourself to breathe deeply in a rhythmic
manner.
Your breath is an important fuel, and it determines the amount
of dirty laundry you can handle. Breathe in a slow expansive
rhythm and you'll tend to feel calm and capable.
Train yourself to only "speak" your internal dialogue during
your exhales.
3. Tune into your heartbeat.
Your heartbeat helps determine the optimal pace and rhythm
you operate at. Notice your heartbeat, meld it to your breath,
and from time to time as you exhale, repeat something like "Calm
and confident" or "Thank you".
4. Sense the rhythm of your brain waves
With practice you can learn to sense your brain waves and alter
them. When your brainwaves slow down, "you" slow down. Seem
hard to imagine doing? It's called "biofeedback".
5. Tune into the rhythm of your cranial-sacral pump.
Cranial-sacral fluid bathes and protects your skull and spinal
chord. With practice you can sense its flow and move with
it. You'll notice a profound calming affect when you do.
Experience yourself as a finely crafted musical instrument.
With practice, you'll find you can orchestrate the rhythms
of your body, and feel more alive and joyful. At such times
you'll realize you're expressing the music of your soul.
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